• The Hopefulist

Connection = Confidence


How is your squad looking these days? Do you have a good group to rally around you when needed? I'm personally a social person. I love to be around people. I have big groups of friends and smaller groups of friends. And they all enhance and enrich my life. It's been tough during Covid for everyone so we're all probably starving for some girl or gang time by now. Hopefully things will open up soon and we can all get out of the freaking house. Spring is coming, right? Fingers crossed. Yesterday was a gorgeous day here at the Jersey Shore and I took advantage. I spent a little time playing...you guessed it...pickleball. It felt so good to be outside with the sun shining on my face and chatting with some fellow players. It was exactly what I needed.


Not only are social connections important but so is connecting with yourself. How often do you do that? Admittedly, I don't do it very often. Part of the conference I took part in the other day had a brief meditation run by Jay Shetty and I have to tell you...it was only a few minutes but it did feel very comforting and refreshing. I may have to give it more of a go. Take some time to connect with your thoughts and yourself. You need some time to think and connect with just yourself. Get up a few minutes before the kids if you have to. Or grab a glass of wine at the end of the day alone with no distractions. Yes, that includes the television.


When it comes to the other relationships in your life your hope is to be around positive people and create great relationships in your life. You do this by sharing your thoughts, feelings, goals and dreams with those in your life. Like we discussed yesterday with congruence, it's important to share your truth despite what others think. If people don't like the real you then shame on them. And move along, sister.... because there are so many people in this world. Be with those who want to be with your and who will enrich your life. Because here's the thing, the more you speak your true thoughts to people, the deeper the connection becomes. And making social connections based on the real you increases your confidence.


Another factor for building confidence is capability which is the trust you have in yourself to take action. It's not only having the knowledge and skillset, it's the execution of that knowledge. You have to be consistent in the execution of your plan. It's sort of like knowing you have to eat right and exercise to lose weight. That's not enough. You have to take that information and execute it with a plan to eat healthy and exercise. So, you can be capable without having capability.


What is needed is the development of a pattern of action taking that leads you toward your goal. When you complete the tasks you've given yourself you feel you have the capability to complete what you say you will and work toward your goal. And when you do complete your tasks....celebrate yourself! Make sure you mark it down as a win. We are so busy berating ourselves for what we don't get done make sure we party it up when we do follow through. All of these leads to building up our confidence. Better social connections and capability. It's a simple as spending more time with your squad, building a better squad or personal relationship and be yourself...completely. As well as follow through. Just do it! You'll feel so much better about yourself. Look at confident you!


It's Thursday! Hope you are having a great week. Go out there and be badass today. I'm here, cheering you on.

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