• The Hopefulist

Dreams that came true

So often when we think about our self image we concentrate on what we haven't achieved yet rather than what we have. We tend to be future focused which is okay. But we have to stop occasionally and pat ourselves on the back for how far we've come. It's so important for our own sense of self to always remember how much we have done along the way. How many dreams we have already made come true.

This is a picture of my house. The one I never thought I would have. The one that I thought would always be way over my budget and out of reach for me in this lifetime. But where there is a will, there is a way. There were a number of forces that came together to allow us to grab this little slice of heaven. We first ended up in this neighborhood when we quickly sold our condo and needed a place to live. We took on a two year lease for a rental. While living here I realized that we were in a good position to make a purchase of our own. Property values were low due to Superstorm Sandy but they were going back up again. I knew within a year or so a house in this neighborhood would be out of reach for us once again. We looked for a long time....about six month. Finally, I found this house myself as I kayaked past it one day and saw the for sale sign. It was way out of our budget. I thought we could probably swing it if we limited our monthly bills and I started making a little more money. We took the plunge. We've been here for almost four years now and have made every mortgage payment (so far!). A dream come true. So when I tend to be hard on myself for things I haven't achieved as of yet, I need to always remember how much I have already made happen in my life. And you need to do the same.

Look around you right now wherever you are. What do you see that at one time was only a dream? Is it the house you are living in? Is it your children, your spouse, your job, your car? If you take the time to look at what you have which you only dreamed of at one time, I think you will find you have quite a bit to be proud of. It's so important to remind ourselves of this because we so rarely do it. And be patient. I know it's hard but the really good stuff often takes longer. I remember going to see my aunts new house with an amazing kitchen. I was going on and on about how beautiful it was. She responded with; "well, it took me until age 60 to get my dream kitchen". So all things come in time. Try to be patient while working toward your goal.

I've recommended in the past and am doing so again, that you write yourself a letter touting all your accomplishments. Write a letter to your younger self saying how far you have come and all that you have. Trust me when I say you will feel really good about yourself if you do this. Include everything from professional goals to physical goals and personal goals. What does your family look like? How are those kids making out? Are you putting yourself first? If it isn't the life you've always dreamed of, how much closer are you now than you once were? Every little bit of progress counts. Keep looking around and counting your blessings. Do you have a great dog? Is your house decorated exactly how you want it? Do you have enough food in the fridge and access to clean water and electricity? A favorite sweatshirt and boots to put on for the day? Count it all!

Once you realize how far you've already come it will give that self image a big boost. The future won't look so insurmountable once you realize how much you have already tackled and achieved. Keep doing you. Keep working toward those goals and dreams with the knowledge that you've done it before so, of course, you can keep crushing it. You've already proven you have it in you. Just keep going. Just keep doing. Just keep dreaming.

It's cocktail Friday y'all! We made it...woo hoo! Hope you can grab an adult beverage later today. Have a fantastic weekend and be safe in whatever you do. Go on...be your badass self. You know I'm cheering you on.

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