• The Hopefulist

Love your surroundings!


This is my little slice of heaven. Isn't it cute? I love where we live. I love the fact that it's on the water, the location, our neighbors and our house and yard. I didn't always feel this way about where I lived though. I've lived in some doozy of places. But I had a goal to get to the Jersey Shore full time and I made it happen. It wasn't easy and it didn't happen overnight. We also had to make sacrifices to live here. The house was way over budget so we had to cut expenses in other areas. They say you shouldn't be house poor and I agree...unless you live here and are okay with never leaving home...which we are! And during times like we've been having, being sentenced to home quarantine...it's great to love where I live.


Like I said though, wasn't always this way. I've lived in some pretty sketchy areas. Most of them were short term and not that big of a deal. I've lived next to drug dealers, people that are loud and don't care about anyone else. In our last place, we lived next door to a prostitute. Honestly! And watched her change from office worker, to stripper, to prostitute. I used to get up in at 3 in the morning to get ready for work and there would be strange men in my parking lot waiting for her to get home from her job at the strip club. To say she didn't care about her neighbors is an understatement. There was an older woman that lived below her for many years and she couldn't take the late hours. The girl would come home at 2 or 3 in the morning wearing high heels that would click all over her hardwood floors waking the neighbor downstairs. After a few months of getting nowhere the woman sold her condo and moved out. She hesitated to do that for some time. She didn't want to be chased out of her home. But she was miserable. She had absolutely no peace. If you can't find peace at home, you have no peace in your life. That woman was smart. She was in a toxic situation and she got out. It's not about winning and losing...it's about having a life that you enjoy with little stress.


What is the situation where you live? Do you like the area? Do you have good neighbors? Is it the type of house you want? If you answered no to any of these questions, then start planning. Make a move. You're not a tree! I've heard all the reasons for not moving. It's a lot of trouble. The market isn't great right now. I don't know where I'll go. My kids need the stability. I've addressed this before and I'll say it again. You are the boss in your kids life until they move out. If you want to move, that is your choice...they have to follow. If you don't want to uproot your kids, that is fine but just remember this is a choice you are making. No one...and I mean no one (except maybe a spouse) can force you to stay where you are.


I've had the dream of moving to the Jersey Shore for many years. I lived here full time in the early 2000's and it was one of the best times of my life. I wanted to make it home again. I have always thought that if you love where you live you are halfway to everyday happiness. There is something about getting up everyday with an appreciation for where you are.


If you are unhappy, start making plans. Do what is going to make you happiest. You have this one life, we really should make our own happiness more of a priority. Your kids will get the chance to make all their own dreams come true. This is your life and your time. You are the grown up now...you earned the right.


If you are completely happy where you are...good for you! My work is not needed for you today! So go on out and be your badass self today! Of course, I'm cheering you on!

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