Talking your way to the life of your dreams
Here we are. 2022! Congratulations...we made it! The start of a new year is always so full of hope and dreams of a better future. It's a clean slate. We want so much. But where do we start?
When it comes to transforming your thoughts the number one thing is the way you talk to yourself. Back in my pessimistic ways I was known to say to everyone that I had the worst luck. Then I would follow it up with examples. I was so known for this that one of my friends once told her son when he mumbled that he had the worst luck she told him; "no, Wendy McClure has the worst luck." Hmmm, is this something I wanted to be known for? At the time it seemed pretty funny that she threw that out there. And it is funny but sad at the same time. What was I getting out of that though? Let's explore that for a second.
I limited the expectations others had of me because when things didn't work out it wasn't my fault. I just had bad luck. It released me (in my mind) of having to account for my own decisions and actions. Also, there was a touch of people feeling sympathy for me. Hence, would be more inclined to let me have my way. Whether it be where we went to eat, what movie to see, who went first in a game we were playing, etc.
Since I had the examples to back up my statement; "I have the worst luck." I determined that to be true. But our perception is our reality. And we all have a different perception. Because perception isn't reality. It's the way we see the world. It's not the way everyone sees the world. And there's the rub. The reason I had so many examples of my worst luck life is because that is what I focused on. Yep....instead of looking at all that I have that is good in my life I only saw what I was wrong and what I didn't have.
All of this to say that using the term...I have the worst luck...was not serving me in my life at all. Yes, it gave me the minimal benefits I mentioned a moment ago but that was never going to get me where I wanted to go in life. What you say to yourself is so powerful. It's how you feel about yourself and your life in general.
When you wake up in the morning and think about how tired you are and how much you are dreading the day you are likely to not have the greatest day. If you wake up and think; "yay...it's the start of a brand new day. What a gift!" you will feel completely different going through your day. What if instead of picking apart your appearance in the mirror every you did a Mel Robbins high-5 to yourself? I guarantee you will feel completely different. I know some of this sounds silly and you will be uncomfortable doing it at first but this stuff freaking works. It really does!
The first thing you need to do when you are trying to change your self talk is to be aware of what you are saying to yourself. We are so automatic on the things we tell ourselves we don't even realize how often we are being negative. This is why the number one rule of 'The Hopefulist' is to never call yourself names. We start to believe them after awhile and honestly there is never a reason to call yourself a bad name. You are wonderful and worthy and we all have our moments of things we wish would have gone differently.
Let's put it this way....if you did something silly that caused something to happen you wish didn't.... will beating yourself up over it change the situation? I will answer for you. No, it won't. Because you can't shame yourself to a better life. The only way to make things better for yourself is through love, learning and grace.
So, your homework for this week is to start noticing how you talk to yourself. Take note of when you are calling yourself a name, or bashing yourself for doing something you wish you hadn't. Or for doing something you wish you had. Whichever it is. Give yourself grace. Give yourself a lot of leeway to learn, adjust and move forward in a more positive way.
This is the best time of the year to invest in yourself and your life. Do you want to feel at the end of next year the same way you felt at the end of 2021? If the answer to that is no, then now is the time to do a little personal positivity training. I can work with you to show you how I transformed from pessimist to 'The Hopefulist'. The tried and true methods that worked for me can work for you too. And you can finally start living your best life. Because there is absolutely no point in waiting any longer. Live life better starting now. If you are interested in finding out more please visit hopefulist.com/training. Prices will be going up next week so get in on the lower cost right now!
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Now go forth on this first week of 2022 with badassery abounding. You guys...we got this! Cheers to our best year ever!