• The Hopefulist

The first step of goal setting

Setting and achieving goals is something we all strive for but often fall short. That's usually the case for me anyway. What does that mean? Do we suck? Are we bad at doing what we say we're going to do? Do we take on too much? Or do we have a bad plan? It can be any or all of these. Except for the "we suck" part. We just need to find a better way. And the most important thing when it comes to achieving goals is to actually believe we can do it. This can be a big hurdle for many of us since we may have let ourselves down in the past. Hear this...you absolutely can do anything you set your mind to. But also know that you need a plan of how you are going to get there.

As women we have often fallen short of our health and fitness goals. I know I am not the only one who has tried to lose weight and has been unsuccessful. Does this mean I am stuck with myself at my current weight? Does this mean I just can't do it? No, of course not. But we do have to try something that we can handle. Often we try to take on too much at once. We restrict our diet too stringently. We start a physical routine that is too much too soon. Then we quit. Does this mean we don't have what it takes? No, it means we took on too much too soon and set ourselves up for failure. But the result often is that we feel that we just can't do it. We can't count on ourselves so we don't believe in our ability to get where we want to go. This is the time to be really honest with yourself. What do you think you can handle and what will make you absolutely miserable? If you love bread and pasta a low carb diet may not be the best route for you to take. If you have never run before don't leave the house one morning with the goal of running five miles. No matter where you are right now you can come up with a plan that will work for you. Here is the bad news, it will take time to lose weight and get in shape. That is just a fact. It won't happen overnight. You have to be patient. What has worked best for me is taking small steps that can lead to lasting change. Come up with a plan that you know you can handle. And then believe wholeheartedly that you can do it. Because I know you can.

Do you have big professional goals? Have you gone for promotions in the past and been overlooked? That doesn't mean you don't have what it takes. It might mean it wasn't your time. It might mean you are in the wrong place. It might mean you actually weren't right for the position. Or it might mean that you have to work a little harder. Once again, come up with a plan. Where is it you want to go? How will you get there? What is it the big bosses are looking for and figure out how to get it for them. But you must believe that you have what it takes to get where you are going. Even if you have failed miserably in the past, you can and will succeed if you have the right plan and believe you can achieve your goals.

Maybe it's more about relationship goals. You would like to reignite that spark between you and your significant other. Then come up with a plan to make that happen. Set aside time to do things that will feed your relationship. Open up the lines of communication and be vulnerable. Share your hopes, dreams and fears. Talk about where you are and where you would like to go. Go on dates, leave notes telling your partner how much they mean to you. But them little gifts that you know they will love. Women love flowers.....what is the male equivalent? I know my man loves candy so I sometimes get him his favorite candy bar. He also brings home my favorite tastykake pie from time to time. Show them how much they mean to you. But you need to have a plan and keep it up. If you were madly in love once, you likely can be again. But believe that will you do matters and move forward with confidence.

There are so many of us that have been beaten down over the years it can really take a toll. We are let down, often by ourselves and we get to a point where we don't believe in ourselves at all anymore. But I'm here to tell you you can do whatever you set your mind to. You just need to be realistic and have a plan that will work for you. You have to be really honest in what you think you can handle and what you know will cause you to fail. Don't take on too much too soon and be patient. Find joy in the journey.

It's Taco Tuesday! Will you be having tacos? Maybe a margarita? Whatever you do today, make it great and be badass. I'm right here, cheering you on.

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